Aum refuses to acknowledge new beau unless she gets a house

The word spilled that she and her boyfriend were no longer on good terms. 

Snagged by reporters at the Sparkling Wine Celebration over the weekend, Aum once again rejected the term “break-up”, but admitted that she and Amp haven’t been in touch with one another in a long time, the longest ever for them. “We just don’t understand each other and we’re keeping our distance – we haven’t talked about it,” she said. 

The press was prepared for the non-answer, so they’d brought in the heavy artillery, and if there’s any truth to this bit of gossip, put the headline writers on high alert. “We heard Chonsawat Asavahame gave you an iPhone 6 – is that true?” one of the reporters asked. 

“Not true!” Aum replied in a flash. In fact she was shocked by the groundless report. “Do I know him? Yes, I know him as much as other friends know him, but there’s nothing personal.” Aum said she still uses the same phone she bought herself. And, anyway, couldn’t the rumourmongers come up with something more exciting than a phone, like maybe someone giving her a car or a house? 

“No, I’m not being serious about it, but frankly speaking, I don’t want to have any trouble with anyone,” she said. Hmm, why would the rumour cause her any “trouble”, unless Amp’s feeling annoyed about it? And we sort of doubt he is.

 

Fetish out of control

While we’re waiting for someone to give Aum a house, we have breaking news about the Chinese women who earlier this year began championing unshaven armpits. You might recall the online competition they started – “Girls Not Plucking Armpit Hair”. Perhaps you entered.

Inevitably, it seems, the growing of hair under the arms turned out to be a gateway fad to another, more profound trend – dyeing your armpit hair bright colours. Now you can flick on Instagram and – using the hashtag “#dyedpits” – view dozens of photos of rainbow underarms. We’ll wait right here while you go have a look.

This is hardly just a Chinese thing. American Roxie Hunt, who works in a saloon but also maintains a blog called “Offbeat Home and Life”, reveals that she’s always wanted to dye someone’s armpit hair. “I’ve actually done it once, but it was late at night with too much wine and without the proper tools.” Evidently Roxie’s co-worker, Rain, agreed to the tonsorial treatment – in blue, like the hair on her head. So Roxie has all the tips on how it’s done. 

Meanwhile back at Instagram, user “ladypit- hair” has loads of photos of various varicoloured female underarms and is begging for more. Some have two different hues, one for each pit. Last time we looked (five minutes ago), “ladypithair” had 631 pictures of women with coloured pits, and another 74 on Instagram under the “dyedpits” tag. Thus far, none of the posts originated in Thailand.

We know what you’re wondering: Will dyed pit hair be the next big thing? Well, from our extensive research, we’ve learned that those who’ve done the dyed, er, deed, say it will, whereas those who think it’s the stupidest idea since devil-horn implants are sure the dyed pits won’t catch on, other than catch on fire.