The duty we owe our father

The grand ceremony, a testament to Thailand’s rich culture and social uniqueness, will be over soon. All the people of the nation have joined hands to bid a final farewell to a beloved King, amid characteristically sincere and concerted efforts across the land. More important, perhaps, is the readiness to honour a pledge – to follow in the footsteps of the father.
The royal funeral is a profession of genuine love for the late monarch, as the whole world will see today. Yet the ceremony also signals that the time has come for the “children” to attend to their assigned responsibilities. Calling ourselves children of His Majesty King Bhumibol Adulyadej during his lifetime was a humble show of reverence to the great man, but the word “children” is associated, too, with irresponsibility. He did all he could in his time, and now the onus is on every citizen to make His Majesty’s wishes come true.
Children, in both the literal and figurative sense, can be ignorant without guilt. They can feel love, but they can also take love for granted. They can overlook matters of importance, including the worthwhile teachings of their parents. They can cry over the passing of their father and mother, yet tears do not constitute a vow to honour their parents’ hopes and ambitions.
A father might think it’s all right for his children to be ignorant, to take love for granted, to ignore teachings, and to merely go on with their own lives. King Rama IX never insisted that Thais embrace his guidance, but we know this much: It was offered with no agenda other than being of help to his children.
He taught perseverance, honesty, simplicity, self-reliance and a unity devoid of aggression. Only through embracing these principles might Thais’ love for the King truly mature. It has been an historic and remarkable love, but it’s the love of children all the same. This love grew strong on occasions, but it was often the level of affection that prompts Father’s Day gifts or occasional family-reunion dinners. His Majesty’s love was of a different magnitude, constant and unconditional, selfless sacrifice and dedication even demonstrated often behind the scenes.
Subtly, he also taught the merits of pid thong lang phra – putting gold leaf on the back of the Buddha statue, and thus avoiding ostentation. Good deeds should be done without expectation of praise or reward. Even with the publicity surrounding royal activities, he managed to accomplish much beyond public notice. Only since his death have we identified the truly inspirational nature of some royal activities captured in newsreel footage.
Tears and grief serve to confirm that the father’s children know the level of love he gave them. It was everywhere to be experienced – in calendar photos on a wall, in coffee-table books, in old-fashioned printed New Year appeals to nurture harmony and live in simple dignity. His Majesty gave his love selflessly, and that must count for something among the children.
Bidding the final farewell is like sending someone a greeting card in the knowledge it will be understood and welcomed with great affection. There will also be the knowledge, though, that the recipient will yearn for the day when the sender becomes truly mature, independent and virtuous. It is, after all, the only way two loves can become one.